won’t see me
you glaze over me like a distant thing an
irritating spot you want to scrub off or
look the other way so it hides in your blind spot
answer every question with a defence ready to
water this witch instead of the sister that I am
when I have imagined us getting along for years and
hoped that one day I would grow into you but you
shuffle backwards and away disgruntled and annoyed
that I tried to hug you with a yellow-snot nose
you do alot and I see it but I only remember that
its bad I know and that is the mess you kick
you never looked so you never saw the intention in my heart
the endless invisible conversations I’ve had, the three of us,
that feeling of security and comfort when you are around the
people you have grown up with
looking out for one another
I feel alone
this is not a poem
I will not try to make it rhyme or communicate it clearly
I just want to write it because- better out than in
I feel like you don’t love me


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