life is

more fleeting than imagination

an understanding

always floating just out of reach

that mirror matter 

shimmered shatter

the mist the mist that has

forgotten how to speak.

Time has forgotten its line and

so it stands un-observed like a

lesson on repeat

moments will only shine from a distance

a nostalgic persistence asking you something you can’t quite hear

and so you crept closer, listening, nearer

and that is when it shows

You that the only thing you, of the now, do have. Is

that

present.

 

 

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Fly

Don’t ‘learn’ to fly,

Don’t ‘try’

just hop and hop and jump and leap and

bound until you fly.

When you’ve been walking all your life

heals scraping tarmac growing blisters

on your toes and growing dullness in your mind and

a heart slowly turning from flesh to stone until you

stop.

Don’t walk today, don’t struggle, don’t scrape your feet slowly

nearing that distant pindrop goal. Don’t give in to the tedious and struggle that is the journey. Don’t let it be the journey.

No, -know that you are already there.

That journey: it is here! you are where you need to be and where you

need to be is -you-

so be, and breath, and Fly.

 

if its

difficult. If it makes you look away with a faster patter and a hyperventilate,

If it’s terrifying. If it makes your heals tremor on edge and your mind run unable to negotiate

Then Stop.

and remember to breathe…

Then take a brick -to break- the outside of your heart, take a stick -to fish out- every restless thought inside the ocean of your mind (put it in a box called self-acceptance, and this time try not to lose it!)

Don’t be impatient.

Take a half-step slow tread with an open heart and an empty mind. be brave and smile at this intention to start

moving forward,

Carrying all your dreams with you and, facing all your fears with love.

 

 

the power of words

is in the energy they carry

How  they speak the dialect of your whole soul

in every syllable spoken or the words that are not said

How they try to paint a picture or what the picture is instead

but words would water thirsty egos if they could (and that’s no good!)

…look up pick down the things they can reach

or words could lift a heavy heart to inspire- as they should

…look down pick up the things that they teach

and we are all responsible

so let us be more aware of the power of our speech

Words stay

If I can’t look when i see, and I can’t see when I look, then why do see and look have interchangeable meanings?

if its all about the journey, if its all about our steps- then why do we sometimes wish we could skip the steps and travel in leaps and bounds to our dreams?

if its all about the moments that matter, those instances of connection and reassuring understanding, then why do we carry on in steps to forget those memories eventually?

if something really mattered, then why would we let it go?
if something really, really mattered…then how might we hold onto it?
How can we shape the lines of our existence to make our matters matter and our steps concrete, when everything weathers in the weather, and everything is destined to be but dust in the wind?
What, just what is the meaning of all of these miscalculated formulas?
And again, why the steps? why the steps before dreams?
…you wanted to retire early, that was your plan (or, was it your joke?)
and maybe you did,
but I don’t know where to find you anymore.
I’ve retraced your fading steps, I’ve looked to see and seen to look, but you- you don’t know how to be here anymore- and I will not allow it. I will not let you go. I cannot. So let me say, again, my dearest brother bear, -that I never lost you.
Instead, I will color you in words, draw you in descriptions. Words will keep you closer to these times, they will bring you to now in its reflective dimensions, they will keep you with us even though one fist has passed. Words will let us remember you, they will let us speak to you every day.  Memory weathers, yes,  but words….they are a different matter…words will stay a little while longer.

words

They break apart like these letters

that won’t hold any truth to fit the mold

any truth that stems from soul.

And words they keep us laughing

at the elephant in the room

like a big party balloon that is

floating in the way.

And words they show us branches

from the paths that we were on like

a note from the same song that leads

you into the wrong

and words they shift and shiver like

they  aren’t used to the cold

disappear in a second

never stay to become old.

What happened to forever in the

things we say and do? when

each thread was stitched forever

and our tapestry was true

what happened to the kindness and

the people so aware? like my brother who

would notice and who never failed to share

all his love and acceptance and a smile

from sip to soul? it’s a flatsheet of squareworld now

and it feels so alone.

Dreams of fried egg

over nasi goreng

and the crunch of fresh crushed

ice lemon juice (we won’t call it lemonade)

And the dead weight of dates make the palm bend

forward

as neon parakeets collect their sweet treasures and

leave the gems behind to grow. And

the shrieks of a hungry child- who might just

be tired-don’t you know? and a switch to their bright smile,

see the eyes of an opening mind and the stretch

of a waking soul and the wonder and surprise

as their world unfolds

watch this pitter patter of chitter chatter

over chai

Don’t let it sit

let it ponder

let it pass

or let it be

Don’t let it blink

but let it wonder

let it think

and let it see

Don’t let it look back

or let it regret

or get upset

but let it be free

Don’t let it sit

let it look forward

let it hope, let it dream

Don’t let it sit

but let it strive

let it step, let it see